Travel Diary - Day 3Friday, 10:30 am - My uncle Brian and I are ready to go to the airport. They've activated the flightline for any civilian craft flying in for the show, and so we need to park them and make sure the planes are secure in the area. There's one problem: Once we get there, we find out that I need documentation to show proof of my training in Emergency Services. I knew I didn't have the card on me since I hadn't been issued one yet (even though I had completed all requirements), but I figured it was easily verifiable. WRONG! Johnny, what do we have for our losers? Brian calls the commander of my squadron in South Dakota and asks her to fax my card. She agrees to do it within 24 hours. We get as much documentation as we can off the national website, and the mission commander at the airport allows me to go on the flightline with the credentials I have, pending verification by my home unit. I am beyond relieved, and skip my way down to the line.
2:30 pm - We're about done on the
Travel Diary - Day 2Thursday, 9 am – We awaken, basically tired as can be from the day before. The day is filled with such boring duties as ironing uniforms (I ironed my uncle's and my own while he and Teresa tried to cure their hangovers while watching a documentary on the SU-29 fighter jet). There goes 2 hours. I also spend an hour shining my boots until I can see my reflection in them. They both shake their heads at me in pity when I lay some toilet paper over the toes "to keep the dust off". I mention candidly what they can do with themselves, raising my eyebrows at my uncle's scuffed excuses for combat boots to illustrate my point. We eat lunch with Dani and go home to gear up for the night's festivities.
7:00 pm – Teresa and I finally get a hold of my friend Scott, who is stationed with the Air Force Thunderbirds; the flight demonstration team that is the big draw of the air show. We agree to go to the hotel and pick him up. Uncle Brian says he'll hang out at the house until we're ready to g
Swan Song - euphoriathe gap between us is widening
with time and the ebb of emotion's tide
and we both know how it will end
but we cling to the little things
and to each other just a bit longer
for neither of us is quite ready to let go.
We will be someday,
but not right now.
It's funny how seeing you
in front of the kitchen window
makes me forget you're just here visiting now
and sometimes when you smile
I am reminded of a sunset spent on the beach
when I answered your question with a yes.
Even now I would give anything I had
to ensure your happiness
and somehow I know in my heart that
we could never truly walk away from each other.
I need you in my life. I always have.
The person you were when we pushed each other away
is not you now
and it breaks my heart to know
that the person I am saying goodbye to
is the person who cried on our wedding night
speechless with the wonder of it all
Our chance may be over now,
but wherever you go, know this:
There was a time when we were something beauti
Travel Diary - Day 1Wednesday, 5:00 pm - We're 3 hours into our trip to Wisconsin. I'm on my 4th Mountain Dew, and somehow I don't have to urinate. I'm not sure if this is a good or bad thing, but I'm rolling with it. Teresa, my best friend, is driving. In between shrieking "I'm so excited!" and braking the minivan out of an extreme paranoia of speeding tickets, she manages to belt out a few bars of Michael Bolton with me. Yes. Michael Bolton. Female road trips are frightening things. We DID switch to Monster Ballads later in the night, and throw in some GooGoo Dolls in between.
9:30 pm - We arrive at Dani's house. Dani is a distant cousin of mine. We have a beer, smoke a few cigarettes, and talk about our trip and upcoming weekend. We get up to go out to the bar, and suddenly we hear voices outside. Dani turns pleading, saying we can't go since the guy coming up to the house is apparently a drunken bozo. He staggers in, announces himself as Jason, and Teresa and I decide to have a bit of fun
Until We Are FreeMy dearest Anna,
The last three months have been agony. Not at the hands of the enemy, but at the cruelty of the distance between us. I wish I could've written you sooner. As you know, covert ops doesn't allow it. How is our darling Michelle? The two of you smile down at me from the picture above my bunk every night. Sometimes the smiles bubble over into laughter. That's when I wake up - the icy touch of reality freezing the moment over just as I'm starting to enjoy it. The shelling has become a constant drone now. The only part of sanity I'm able to cling to is the thought of us together again.
To my darling Paul,
I die a little inside each time I read your letter (and I have read it so often, dear), for I am horrified at what you must be going through. But to think of never reading your words again, no matter how terrible…I cannot bear it. If only I could be there to comfort you…if only you were here. Little Michelle misses you so…we bot
Being KitMonday, 8:00 pm - Talking to my uncle on Yahoo, whose house Teresa and I will be staying at when we go to Wisconsin. We're talking about the stuff we'll do while I'm out there, and suddenly it hits me. I don't have a photo ID. I misplaced my driver's license a few weeks ago. It's never REALLY been a problem since I don't normally need it. But going out of state? What if I want to have a beer? What if I want to drive? Good grief. I freak out, as does my uncle, who is now convinced I am out to ruin his weekend. He makes jokes about how I can go to the library while he and Teresa go hang out at the hangar party with the fighter pilots from the airshow, in the land of milk and honey brown beer. I scream, frantically type "brb I'm looking for teh thing", and the race is on.
9:00 pm - I have looked all through my house, including each pair of pants in the pile of dirty laundry on the floor, AND the clean pile of laundry on one side of the bed [that has been there for about a week]
Angel Lullabyrest your cheek on linen
and slowly close your eyes
fold your wings around you
with the sound of angel sighs
let me tell you stories
of castles, knights and kings
dragons killed and glory won
and the truth that honor brings
smile for me with sleepy gaze
and let me touch your hair
I'll wonder at its orange-blond shade
and your porcelain skin so fair
dream of all that you could be
when your angel wings are grown
and someday you will see yourself
what I have always known
For you are just a cherub now
with a sweet and innocent face
but I promise you that someday soon
you'll grow in courage and grace
And when the day has finally come
to open your wings and fly
I'll pray I've done the best for you
and tearfully wave goodbye.
SarieI come home from work today with Alex, and as we walk in the door, he runs off to go get his baby guinea pig out of her cage to play with her. Just like every day. They're inseparable, those two. She likes to sit next to him on the couch and watch TV. I'm walking back to the washer to put clothes in the dryer, and I hear him say something about Sarie laying down. I wasn't really listening.
Then I hear him yell, "Mom! Sarie's just laying there!" So I go in the livingroom, and he has her laying on the couch. She's not moving at all, and I think she's dead. Then I see she is gasping for air, and her eyes are open. My first thought was for Alex. I buy him this pet to help him get over Brian walking out on him, and now this. Please don't let her die...
I grab the phone book, frantically paging through while trying to remember the names of the vets in town. Yes! Twin Lakes. That's right. They say they don't see guinea pigs much, just cats and dogs and horses and things.
Soulmate - CollaborationYour skin feels like home.
Each inch of you is a place in my future
that feels like a place from my past,
and this sacred word on my tongue
has slept there, waiting
but I say it in my heart
more often than your name.
You are the other side of me.
Your slumbered breathing is
the rhythm of my heartbeat;
Our bodies are wrapped in each others arms
Like early morning Christmas presents
Where each day becomes a new present from fabled tales
Timeless eyes pull me through and ahead
back to the place it all went wrong;
and somehow it doesn't hurt to be there anymore, for
Where our history would have frightened some
It shows us who we are and where we have come
And why it is that we are the people we love
Words can't contain enough meaning
For what my heart wants to express
Everyday of every hour of every minute
Because with each breath you give me life
And with every kiss you give me strength
And with every heartbeat you keep me alive.